A/N Written in a night. I think its utter crap but since I did spend a whole night on this rather than on uni work, I thought I might as well post it. XD I wasn’t planning on writing, but with the Tatsuya-thon going on, I just couldn’t not write or I’d be ashamed to call myself an Uebo fan. XO

 

 

 

The first time it happens is because of their friends. NEWS and KAT-TUN were scheduled to have a joint performance in Shounen Club somewhere later in the week, and they were having one of their practice sessions.

 

 

Needless to say, whenever these two particular groups had to work together, mayhem always ensued.

 

 

“What are you, a cripple?! That’s the twenty-seventh time you’ve missed a step!” Ryo shouted. “And move your hips like this!”

 

 

“Fuck off, Nishikido! I don’t need you to tell me what to do!” Ueda yelled right back.

 

 

“I do if you’re holding up the whole group!”

 

 

And so it went on and on, the other members of KAT-TUN and NEWS staring at them warily as their band mates argued like 5-year-olds. That was until the brainiest of them all, Jin, came up with a brilliant idea.

 

 

“We’ll lock them in together for a few hours, and then they’ll settle their differences!” Jin whispers to them excitedly.

 

 

The rest of the bunch are hesitant to follow through, but when the argument happening a few feet away started to escalate and a hair-dryer missed Yamapi’s nose by a few millimeters, they decided drastic times called for drastic measures.

 

 

After a quick discussion, they agreed to carry out their plan immediately: their plan consisting of each group bodily lifting their own band mate and literally throwing them into the store room together.

 

 

Two minutes later, each group had forcibly brought both boys - Ueda scratching and biting and Ryo screaming and cursing – and successfully locked them in.

 

 

“What the fuck do you assholes think you’re doing!?!” Ryo barks through the locked door, rattling the doorknob roughly as he tried to force it open.

 

 

“What is the meaning of this?!” Ueda adds, banging on the door loudly.

 

 

Jin gulps as he stares at the door shaking violently, fervently praying that the door will hold.

 

 

“We’re locking you guys in until you’ve made up with each other!” Jin says.

 

 

“What the—? Have you lost your mind?! Oh sorry, I forgot you don’t have one! Let me out of here you idiot!” Ryo roars.

 

 

“Akanishi, be sensible! There’s no point locking me in with someone like him! His ego is so inflated there’s no space left for a brain in his head!”

 

 

“Oh, you think that’s intelligent, don’t you, fish-lips? I have an ego because I can, which is more than I can say for someone as ugly and talent-less as you!”

 

 

“Shut up!”

 

 

And so it continued on and on. The rest of the members moved discreetly back to their practice room to continue their practice in peace.

 

 

Two hours later, after practice was over for that day, Jin went to check on the store room. Hearing no sound at all coming from inside, he was delighted. The two weren’t fighting anymore!

 

 

Now, had it been someone brighter, the silence would have been suspicious. But Jin, thought nothing of it, and proceeded to open the door with a wide grin on his face, only to have his oxygen supply cut off when Ryo suddenly appeared in front of him, hands tight around his neck and a maniacal look on his face.

 

 

It was only when Jin’s face had turned a perfect shade of purple, when a voice spoke up.

 

 

“Stop it, Nishikido! Are you trying to kill him?” It was Ueda.

 

 

“Shut up, fish-lips! That’s exactly what I’m trying to do!”

 

 

“Fine, if you want to spend the rest of your miserable life behind bars, not to mention setting millions of avenging fangirls after yourself for murdering Bakanishi, then be my guest!”

 

 

And with that, Ryo hesitantly let go of Jin.

 

 

Jin slid onto the floor, gasping for air, grateful that he could breathe again. He turned to say ‘thank you’ to Ueda but was shocked when he was met with a glare from the older man.

 

 

“Never do that again!” Ueda said dangerously.

 

 

Jin could only cower in fear and nodded.

 

 

“Your group consists of the most retarded people in the company!” Ryo suddenly said. “What kind of people come up with stupid plans like that?”

 

 

Ueda whirled around to face him. “Oh yeah? Well, your group actually went along with said plan!”

 

 

“Shut up! It’s your fault we got locked in there anyway!”

 

 

And on and on it went. Jin could only stare disappointedly at his two friends. After all that trouble, they didn’t even make up. What a shame.

 

 

 

 

The second time it happened was purely by accident. It was after the performance on Shounen Club, and everyone had been in the dressing room, getting changed.

 

 

Ryo and Ueda had lagged behind due to the fact that they were as usual, bickering when suddenly they realized that the door to the dressing room was stuck.

 

 

“What the--?” Ueda exclaimed as he tried to open the door. “It’s stuck!”

 

 

“What?!” Ryo exclaimed before pushing Ueda roughly away and tried to force open the door. “You idiot, you’ve spoiled the door!”

 

 

“I did not! It was already stuck when I tried it!”

 

 

“Great, now I’m stuck with you again!”

 

 

“Believe me, it’s as much an unpleasant experience for me as it is for you,” Ueda said, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

 

 

Ryo snorted. “Yeah, right. You can’t fool me. I’ve heard the rumors about you. I bet you’re getting excited just having me locked in here with you.”

 

 

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

 

Ryo's smirk grew wide. “Pretending are we? Fine then, I’ll spell it out to you. There have been rumors about you spreading across the company. That you’re gay.”

 

 

Ueda felt his stomach lurch at those words. His cheeks flushed. “W-what?!” he sputtered. “That’s not true!” 

 

 

“With the way you’re reacting now, sure I believe it’s not true,” Ryo said sarcastically, his grin becoming wider. “You’ve had it coming for years, what with your unnatural obsession with that Gackt-freak.”

 

 

“He is not a freak,” Ueda said heatedly, feeling his anger building up. “And I am not gay!”

 

 

“Sure, you’re not,” Ryo drawled on. “I bet you really got off last time, having me stuck in the room with you. I wonder, do you dream of me in that way?” Ryo smirked as he raised an eyebrow at Ueda.

 

 

“Go to hell, Nishikido,” Ueda said before turning his face away from that infuriating smirk. Unfortunately, he couldn’t hide the flush of his face in time and Ryo had seen it.

 

 

“You do think of me!” Ryo exclaimed, his amusement plainly evident in his voice. “You’re sick. But then again, I can’t blame you. Who can resist me?”

 

 

Something in Ueda snapped then. He whipped his head up and glared at Ryo. “Stop it, just stop it! Fine, I am gay, happy now? Get over yourself, you selfish bastard! Not everyone thinks you’re all that and I certainly don’t! There’s much more to life than what your shallow mind knows and it’s about time you realized that!”

 

 

Taken aback by the sudden emotional outburst from the older man, Ryo was rendered speechless. Just as he was collecting himself, the door suddenly burst open in front of them.

 

 

“Ah, am I interrupting something?” Tegoshi said, blinking innocently at Ryo, who had a stunned expression on his face and at Ueda, whom was red-faced and breathing rather harshly.

 

 

Without another word, Ueda had turned heel and stalked off, leaving the two NEWS members behind.

 

 

“Um,” Tegoshi began uncertainly. “I guess I came at the wrong time, huh?”

 

 

Seeing the vulnerable look on Tegoshi’s face, Ryo’s heart softened. “Of course not, Tego-nyan. You came at the perfect time. The door was stuck, it’s a good thing you let us out or we would have been stuck in here all night.”

 

 

Feeling much better, Tegoshi smiled. “If you say so, Ryo-chan.”

 

 

 

 

The third time didn’t happen until a few weeks later. It was during a dance rehearsal and almost all the Johnny’s groups had been there.

 

 

“You what--?!” Ryo snapped through the door.

 

 

“I am so sorry, Nishikido-sempai!” the young junior said frantically. “My friend dared me to lock the door after you’ve entered and he said he had the key but apparently he was lying and—”

 

 

“Okay, okay, enough!” Ryo said, getting irritated. “Just go look for the key now!”

 

 

“Y-yes, sempai!” And the sounds of footsteps shuffling quickly faded away.

 

 

Ryo sighed in frustration before turning around to face one of the most difficult people to deal with at the moment: Ueda Tatsuya.

 

 

This time, they had been locked in a waiting room, where they awaited their turn to perform and it was just pure coincidence really that it was only the two of them in the room when the junior had decided to lock them in.

 

 

Ueda was determinedly ignoring him now, something he had been doing for awhile ever since the last time they were locked in. The older man was calmly reading a magazine, seemingly undisturbed that he was once again being imprisoned.

 

 

Ryo took a seat opposite him. “Are you not going to say anything?”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Ryo frowned. He had expected it, but it still annoyed him. “Are you planning to ignore me forever, fish-lips?”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“Your lips are so fucking swollen I can barely see the rest of your ugly face!”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Ryo was put out. Nothing seemed to be able to get a rise out of the other man anymore. Nothing. Ryo felt annoyance bubble strongly from within him.

 

 

“Look, I don’t know what’s your fucking problem but its proper manners to answer when someone’s talking to you!”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“Fucking answer me!”

 

 

And at long last, Ueda put down the magazine and stared at Ryo. “Stop swearing at me, Nishikido.”

 

 

A sense of satisfaction filled Ryo. Finally, he got a reply out of the other man. For some reason, he didn’t like it when Ueda ignored him like that. It just… didn’t feel right.

 

 

“So what’s been crawling up your ass? Why were you ignoring me these past few weeks?”

 

 

“I was not ignoring you.”

 

 

“Yes, you were! Don’t deny it.”

 

 

“… Fine,” Ueda said. “I was ignoring you.”

 

 

“I knew it. It’s got something to do about you being gay, isn’t it?”

 

 

At this, Ueda obviously tensed. “I don’t want to talk about this.”

 

 

Jackpot. Ryo decided to press on. “What are you being so afraid of? I haven’t exposed you, have I?”

 

 

Ueda kept silent. It was true. Despite Ryo finding out Ueda’s secret, he had not actually said anything to anybody about it.

 

 

“Don’t you think I deserve to be civil to?” Ryo said again.

 

 

“Fine,” Ueda said again. “Thank you for keeping it hushed and I apologize for my less than civil actions.”

 

 

“That’s better,” Ryo said a smile on his face. Ueda’s stomach flipped over.

 

 

“Why are you being nice to me?” the older man couldn’t help asking.

 

 

“Nice?”

 

 

“Keeping my secret, talking to me like a normal person for once albeit the curses and the occasional ‘fish-lips.’ Why the sudden change?”

 

 

“How old do you think I am? I know when I need to be serious. Besides, I can’t have you thinking that I’m shallow-minded now, can I?”

 

 

The corner of Ueda’s mouth curved up slightly at the reminder of his own words. Ryo was smiling too. For once, the both of them were not full-out arguing. It was a nice change.

 

 

“So… when did you find out?” Ryo asked suddenly.

 

 

Ueda blinked. “Find out?”

 

 

“That you were gay.”

 

 

Ueda blushed at the straight-forward question. He hesitated. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to share bits of his personal life with Nishikido just yet, but the way Ryo was smiling at him made him feel like he could trust him for once.

 

 

“Well, it was in high school. I had a crush on a classmate.”

 

 

“A boy?”

 

 

“Obviously,” Ueda rolled his eyes. “That’s how I found out.”

 

 

Ryo laughed. Not a spiteful laugh, but something more genuine. Ueda felt his heart skip a beat and his stomach flipping over yet again at the sight.

 

 

“So, what kind do you like?”

 

 

“Kind…?”

 

 

“Yeah, kind, donkey-face. As in, the muscular type or the blonde hair and blue eyes type, what kind of men do you like?”

 

 

There was a cheeky grin on Ryo’s face now, and Ueda flushed more.

 

 

“Why do I have to tell you?” he said defensively.

 

 

“Come on now. We’re trying to get to know each other better here. Something Pi and the others have been telling us to do since forever. And besides, it’s nice to be having a proper conversation sometimes.”

 

 

 

 

Ueda shook his thoughts free. “No way am I telling you. It’s private.”

 

 

“Spoilsport. You’re no fun.”

 

 

Ueda let out a sigh. “Fine, since you want to know that badly, I’ll tell you.” Ueda could literally see Ryo’s ears perk up as he said this. He smiled inwardly as his heart skipped yet again at the sight of Ryo’s face lighting up.

 

 

It was a feeling he had gotten used to for awhile now. He had recently come to terms with the idea that he had a crush on Nishikido Ryo. But he never did anything about it for obvious reasons. There was simply no way he and Ryo could ever be anything other than bitter enemies.

 

 

But perhaps things were looking up now?

 

 

“I generally like people with dark hair and eyes, reasonably good-looking. But looks aren’t the most important thing. It’s important that he understands me, and cares about me. He must be sensitive to my feelings too, and can accept me for who I am… What counts most… is that I love him and… he loves me.”

 

 

As Ueda trailed off, he ducked his head in embarrassment. It was only after the words were out of his mouth that he realized how awkward it sounded.

 

 

“Um, yeah, that’s about it,” Ueda said, trying to disperse the uncomfortable silence settling around them. Ryo had a thoughtful look on his face.

 

 

Suddenly, he smiled.

 

 

“Um, Nishikido?” a confused Ueda called, a bit unsure about the smile on Ryo’s face. 

 

 

“I wonder…” Ryo murmured slowly. He was leaning forwards and closer to Ueda. “What do you think about… me?”

 

 

“W-what?!” Ueda said, surprised at the suddenness of the question.

 

 

“Don’t tell me you’ve never considered me before? I know for a fact you have…”

 

 

Ueda was speechless. How could this be? Could Ryo have somehow found out how he felt? By now Ryo was so close Ueda could count every single freckle on his face. Part of his mind was screaming at him to back away before anything happened, yet another part of his mind was urging him to move forward and to take those lips in his…

 

 

And so Ueda was stuck somewhere in the middle, where he could only stay still as Ryo moved closer and closer. When Ryo was close enough that he could feel his breath on his lips, Ueda’s eyelids fluttered close and he waited expectantly for a kiss that never came.

 

 

Instead, there was laughter.

 

 

Ueda opened his eyes, feeling disoriented, only to see Ryo clutching his stomach and rolling around on the couch.

 

 

“You fell for it!” Ryo was saying between peals of laughter. “You actually thought I was g-going to—”

 

 

He was interrupted when a hand suddenly swung to slap him hard on the face.

 

 

“What the fuck, fish-lips!” Ryo roared, laughter immediately dying out to be replaced by insurmountable fury. He held a hand to his injured cheek and turned to glare at the other man only to be overwhelmed by the emotion he saw on the other’s face.

 

 

Ueda was on his feet, his hands balled into fists. His expression was a mix of fury, frustration and something else which Ryo couldn’t read very well. Was it… pain?

 

 

Ueda breathed harshly as he stared at the man in front of him. He could still feel the sting of his palm which he had used to slap Nishikido with. He was just so… angry.

 

 

How dare Nishikido toy with his feelings? How dare Nishikido make a fool out of him? How dare Nishikido make him feel for a moment like there was hope when really, Ueda had been right all along? He had knew it from the start. There was no future for his feelings. Damn them all to hell.

 

 

“You are the biggest bastard I’ve had the misfortune to meet,” Ueda said in a low and shaky voice. “I was right about you all this time. I hate you!”

 

 

And with that, he whipped around and ran to the door, banging at it loudly.

 

 

“Let me out!” he screamed almost hysterically. “Open the damned door!”

 

 

Fortunately, the junior chose that time to come back. And in within a minute, the door was open and Ueda rushed out.

 

 

When Ueda had disappeared and the junior mustered the courage to peek inside the room, all he could see was a stunned Nishikido Ryo, sitting exactly where Ueda had left him, still clutching at his swollen cheek.

 

 

 

 

The fourth time happened another few weeks later, and for once, it happened at a time and place outside of work.

 

 

Ryo sighed as he tapped in vain at the glass panes for the millionth time that hour. It was dark out and the glass was tinted so it was extremely difficult for anyone from the outside to see what was going on the inside.

 

 

He was in a small department store which sold everything from groceries to T-shirts. Ryo had been at the men’s apparels, browsing through the many jackets and casual shirts and had just been trying them. He really hadn’t meant to fall asleep in the fitting room, really he didn’t. He just hadn’t been sleeping well lately due to his workload and also, his personal problems. By the time he had woken up, the whole store was in darkness, and he had found himself locked in.

 

 

He had then attempted to call someone for help, but as luck would have it, his cell phone had run out of battery. Next, he tried to catch the attention of the security guards patrolling outside the store, but apparently the guards were only concerned about ensuring no one broke into the building and hadn’t given any thought to the possibility that someone might want to break out from the building. Really, security guards these days are so dumb.

 

 

The only up-side of the whole situation (if it can be considered an up-side at all) was that for some reason, Ueda had been locked in as well.

 

 

Ryo would gladly have asked how the other man got locked in, but considering what had happened between them for the past few weeks, he knew it was futile to even try talking to the man.

 

 

After the last time they were locked in together, Ueda had been actively avoiding him. If previously Ueda had tried to ignore him, this time Ueda positively stayed clear from his path.

 

 

During rehearsals, Ueda stood as far away as he could from Ryo and during breaks, he mysteriously disappeared somewhere where he couldn’t be found until practice started again.

 

 

When there came the few rare times that Ueda couldn’t possibly avoid Ryo, Ryo had tried everything from speaking politely to downright insulting him but Ueda never once even looked his way. It was as if the boy was doing all he could to pretend Ryo didn’t exist.

 

 

It was something that had been greatly disturbing Ryo.

 

 

So much, that he had even resorted to confiding in Pi and Jin.

 

 

“I think you were being insensitive,” Pi had said when Ryo related what had happened in the waiting room to him and Jin.

 

 

“It was just a joke! He didn’t have to take it so hard!”

 

 

“It’s not just a joke to him, Ryo-chan.”

 

 

“What? I don’t understand?” Ryo said, confused.

 

 

Jin sighed. “That’s why Uebo said you were shallow-minded. Have you ever thought about it from his point of view?”

 

 

Ryo blinked, looking completely lost.

 

 

“You just have to figure this one out on you own, Ryo-chan,” Pi had said before waving him off, signaling that it was time for Ryo to leave him and Jin alone.

 

 

And so now, Ryo was standing here, tapping at glass panes hoping that he would be noticed soon whilst the person - whom was part of the cause of his fatigue - sat on the floor at the corner. 

 

 

Ryo sighed, giving up. At least he knew he would be let out when morning came and the store opened.

 

 

He stole a look at the older man sitting quietly in the corner with his arms wrapped around his knees. He debated his options for awhile and came to a decision. He took a few tentative steps towards the other man. When he got no response, he settled himself beside the other boy. He was relieved. At least Ueda wasn’t trying to run away from him like he had been doing recently.

 

 

Silence reigned.

 

 

Ryo shuffled his feet. The tension was unnerving. It couldn’t hurt to try talking to him now, could it?

 

 

“So how did you end up here?”

 

 

Silence, as expected.

 

 

“You have a working cellphone on you?”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“You’re determined to ignore me, aren’t you?”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“You know, the last time, I was just playing around.”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“…”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Ryo was getting annoyed and frustrated. No matter what he said, Ueda was paying him no heed and the silence was bothering him greatly. He didn’t like being ignored and he certainly wasn’t used to it. As funny as it may sound, he was missing the other boy’s role in his life. Whether it was as a bitter rival, a co-worker, or even as a friend, he wished the other boy would do something, anything except ignore him like this. It was getting difficult to handle and the silence was beginning to suffocate him.

 

 

He had done a lot of thinking since everything that had happened and also what Pi and Jin had told him. His mind was sub-consciously coming to a conclusion but his conscious mind didn’t seem to be able to realize it yet. All he knew was that he needed to get Ueda to speak to him again.

 

 

“What do I have to do to get you to talk to me?” Ryo continued to press on, willing for his patience to hold.

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Ryo snapped. To hell with his patience. He whirled around and grabbed Ueda by the collar.

 

 

“Say someth—” And narrowly avoided getting punched in the nose. Ryo abruptly let go of Ueda. As he knelt there on the floor, he saw for the first time in weeks Ueda’s gaze on him. It was angry and dangerous. He knew he had crossed his line.

 

 

Ryo let out a breath slowly trying to regain control. “Look… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Frustration boiled over. “Fine, if you want to be that way then go ahead! But you’re going to listen to my explanation!”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

When Ryo was sure Ueda wasn’t going to go anywhere, he started to speak as calmly as he could. “I don’t know why you’re so angry, but what I did that day was just for fun. I wasn’t making a fool out of you if that’s what you think. I was just teasing. I really meant for us to be… friends.”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“See? I’m still being nice and civil to you now. Doesn’t that prove that I’m honestly trying to change things between us?”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

“If you don’t tell me what’s wrong, I’m not going to know cos I’m being serious when I say I’m clueless here.”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Ryo was starting to really lose his patience at the prolonged silence. His tone started to raise in pitch. “Now, look here, fish-lips. There’s only so many times I can grovel on the floor and apologize to you. If you’re not going to accept it, then there’s nothing I can do—”

 

 

“Then don’t.”

“—and if you’re… eh?” Ryo said, disconcerted at the sudden words from Ueda.

 

 

“I said don’t. Don’t apologize if you don’t want to.”

 

 

Ryo stared at the KAT-TUN member, whom had his gaze fixed on the floor. He frowned when the meaning of the other’s words sank in.

 

 

“I do want to apologize, but if you’ll just tell me what I did wrong—”

 

 

“You still don’t get it, do you?”

 

 

“Would you stop saying that?!” Ryo bristled. “Why is everyone implying that there is something that only I am not getting?! Pi says I have to figure it out on my own and even Bakanishi is saying I’m shallow-minded!”

 

 

“Because it’s been weeks and you still don’t get it!” Ueda said heatedly, body tensing and eyes flaring.

 

 

“If you would just point it out to me then I’ll get it just fine!” Ryo shouted back, the temper and frustration he had been holding back for weeks all breaking loose.

 

 

“You’re so dense!” Ueda shouted back, getting on his knees as well so that he was face-to-face with Ryo.

 

 

“Better than being a freak!”

 

 

“Bastard! You don’t understand anything!”

 

 

“Bitch! The fuck I don’t and most of all, I don’t understand you!”

 

 

Ueda’s eyes flashed. “Fine! Do you really want to know what exactly it is that you don’t get? The reason I was fucking pissed at you that day and still am until now?”

 

 

“Yes! Fucking hell! Haven’t I established that—”

 

 

And Ryo found himself unable to continue what he was saying as he found himself being kissed senseless by Ueda.

 

 

Ryo’s eyes widened as he felt warm lips moving against his own. Before he could do anything other than stay frozen, Ueda had already pulled away.

 

 

“That’s what you don’t get, you bastard! That’s what’s wrong!” Ueda blurted out, his voice shaky and just a few pitches too high. “I’m in love with you!”

 

 

And once again without another word, Ueda got up and rushed towards the glass panes.

 

 

Ryo felt his stomach lurch as Ueda began kicking at the glass panes, worry for the other man’s safety suddenly overwhelming him. But before he could say or do anything, Ueda had heaved a nearby tin of baked beans and hurled it at one of the panes, effectively breaking through it.

 

 

Immediately, the security alarms all around the store went off and there was a shout from outside which could only be from the dumb security guard. Finally, they’ve gotten his attention, Ryo bleakly realized.

 

 

He watched as the security guard started chasing after Ueda whilst another caught sight of him sitting inside.

 

 

As the security guard approached him, Ryo realized belatedly that there was moisture on his face that certainly didn’t come from him. He brushed at it, and stared at where Ueda had been sitting only moments before.

 

 

The wheels in his mind started clicking in place. His conscious mind finally realizing what it is that his sub-conscious had concluded some time ago, but had just never fully understood.

 

 

Until now.

 

 

 

 

The fifth time it happened, it wasn’t because of anyone’s scheme, wasn’t by pure chance and certainly wasn’t coincidence.

 

 

Ryo locked the door behind him as he entered KAT-TUN’s dressing room.

 

 

The only occupant in the room jumped when he heard the door being locked. Ueda turned around and his eyes widened when he came face to face with Nishikido Ryo.

 

 

“How—wha—?” Ueda started to say bewilderedly. KAT-TUN were currently filming Cartoon KAT-TUN in the studio. Kanjani8 were supposed to be away in Osaka and NEWS were supposed to be busy with their concert tour, so it was only natural that Ueda was caught by surprise at Nishikido’s sudden presence.

 

 

“I took a break from rehearsals to come and see you,” Ryo said nonchalantly before starting to advance on Ueda.

 

 

Ueda gulped visibly and tried to move away from the other man – which proved difficult since his only way out was behind said man.

 

 

It had been three days since the incident at the department store. Things had been crazy after Ueda had broken through the glass pane, especially since the security guards found it necessary to take them to the police station and interrogate them.

 

 

Fortunately, finding nothing missing from the store and property mostly undamaged (except for that one broken glass pane), the security guards had believed their explanation that they had been locked in and both boys were let go after calling their Managers, albeit having needed to pay compensation for the broken glass.

 

 

Both of them had gotten an earful then from their Managers, but thankfully the matter was agreed to be kept secret from Johnny, or who knew what that crazy old man would have done.

 

 

At that time, Ryo couldn’t have cared less if Johnny had or had not found out. All he knew was that he had surprisingly been extremely worried that Ueda had somehow hurt himself for pulling such a stunt, and when he was sure the older man was fine, he found himself worrying about his mental state instead. But he never got a chance to talk to Ueda again that night in between all the hustle and bustle.  

 

 

Ever since then, Ryo and Ueda had never met face to face. Until now.

 

 

“What do you want to see me for, Nishikido?” Ueda said warily.

 

 

He had been dreading this meeting with the other man since his confession at the department store. He had regretted it deeply and had spent the last three days wondering what had made him do something so stupid.

 

 

Ueda was afraid of what would happen now. What would happen now that Ryo knew? Would he laugh and mock him? Or would he turn around with disgust and never look at him again?

 

 

Neither appealed to him.

 

 

Ignoring and avoiding the other man for the past few weeks had been hard enough on Ueda already. He had to constantly battle the yearning he had to see the other man, being severely aware of how much he missed the Osakan man’s presence, despite how unpleasant it was sometimes. However, fear that Ryo would find out about his feelings especially since he had let slip to Ryo that he was gay and also not to mention the incident in the waiting room had only made things worse and since then, Ueda had kept well away from the other man believing that it was the best thing to do, to protect his heart and feelings.

 

 

That was, until the day at the store where everything fell apart and the one thing he was trying to keep secret burst forth in that one moment of lack of control.

 

 

And now, Ueda was at a loss. He didn’t know what he expected, but he certainly wasn’t prepared to meet the other man. But prepared or not, here he was, standing right in front of him now.

 

 

Ryo was grinning widely. He had Ueda cornered. “I just need to get things straight between us,” he said.

 

 

“What about,” Ueda asked, suddenly aware that he was trapped between the wall behind him and Nishikido.

 

 

“First of all, I want to thank you for making things clear,” Ryo said. “I appreciate you telling me. I understand perfectly now.”

 

 

Ueda nodded. What else was there to say?

 

 

“Secondly, I want to… apologize for my actions in the waiting room the other day. I know what I done must have… hurt you in some way, but I want you to know that I really didn’t mean it as anything other than a joke.”

 

 

Ueda nodded again.

 

 

“Thirdly, I’ve been doing some thinking myself. And I want you to know that I’m not angry or disgusted or anything, so you don’t have to look like you’re so scared of me.”

 

 

Ueda gulped and tried to school his features to hide his discomfort. He nodded. Ryo now had one hand pressed against the wall just beside Ueda’s right ear, cutting off all escape routes. Ueda felt his heart beat erratically against his chest, feeling more nervous than he had ever been in his life. He half-expected Nishikido to cruelly reject him anytime now and to spit in his face at what a fag Ueda was being, yet the other half had hope manifesting again…

 

 

“And lastly… I need you to answer a question that you never did manage to answer before.”

 

 

“W-what’s that?”

 

 

Ryo smiled widely, leaning in closer. “The question I asked you in the waiting room,” Ryo whispered softly into his ear. “What do you think of me…?”

 

 

Ueda froze. What was Ryo playing at?

 

 

“Come on now, princess, and I want an honest answer this time.”

 

 

Ueda shivered at the nickname Ryo used, feeling goose bumps behind his neck. He took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. There was nothing to it. He had nothing else to lose.

 

 

“You have dark hair and eyes. You’re reasonably good-looking. You never seem to understand or care about me, and you’re definitely insensitive about my feelings. You’ve never accepted me, or my looks, or my interests before. But…” and here Ueda swallowed, his throat feeling dry. “I do love you… but I have no idea what you feel about me.”

 

 

Ueda turned away, closing his eyes and feeling extremely vulnerable. There. He’d done it. A full-out confession. And now would be the perfect time for Ryo to laugh at him, to make a total idiot out of him. He prepared himself for the worst.

 

 

It never came.

 

 

Instead, he felt a finger under his chin, pushing his face upwards so that he once again faced Ryo. He opened his eyes slowly afraid of what he would see. But all he saw was a very serious expression on Ryo’s face.

 

 

“Idiot,” Ryo said harshly, and Ueda winced, heart plummeting. And suddenly, he was being kissed.

 

 

Ueda froze for all of 2 seconds before he melted into the kiss, feeling Ryo’s hands moving down to his waist. Wrapping his arms around Ryo’s neck, he tried to push their bodies closer but Ryo was already pulling away.

 

 

They both took a moment to regain normal breathing when Ryo started to speak, looking straight into Ueda’s eyes as he did so.

 

 

“I may not understand you but I do care about you, never doubt that, princess. I may be insensitive but I’ve never meant to hurt you and its not that I’ve never accepted you… I’ve just never been able to accept that I was attracted to you and because of that… I might have been a bit hard on you… I’m sorry.”

 

 

Ueda stared at the Osakan man whom was saying all this to him so seriously. He could hardly believe his ears. He had never heard Ryo speaking so gently before and especially not to him. Never.

 

 

“And about my feelings for you…” Ryo said before he started shifting uncomfortably, and Ueda felt the edges of his mouth which had been turning upwards start to fall. Did Ryo not feel the same? Ueda felt the beginnings of a heartbreak, when Ryo spoke again in a soft voice.

 

 

“While I can’t say truthfully yet that I’m in love with you… I can say at the very least that I am… attracted to you. And this,” Ryo stole a kiss, “definitely feels nice,” another kiss.

 

 

Ueda pondered on that a moment, before a hesitant smile appeared on his face. He supposed that was the best he could get for now. And it was more than enough.

 

 

“So… are we…?” Ueda started cautiously.

 

 

“Dating?” Ryo asked, eyebrow raised. “Why, of course we are, princess. And consider yourself extremely lucky to have snagged this Sexy Osaka Man.”

 

 

Ueda rolled his eyes, feeling the awkward atmosphere disappearing fast as they returned to familiar grounds.

 

 

“Get your head out of your ass, Nishi—Ryo...” Ueda said carefully, looking at Ryo for approval.

 

 

All he got was a smile and a peck on the lips before Ryo pulled away from him to sit on the couch, gesturing for Ueda to do the same beside him.

 

 

“So, where do you want to go for dinner tonight?” Ryo asked Ueda as he wrapped an arm around Ueda’s waist, pulling the older man a bit too forcibly towards him as if needing to show Ueda who he now belonged to.

 

 

Ueda’s mouth quirked into a small smile. “A date?”

 

 

Just then, there was banging on the door. “Hey, who locked the door?” Jin’s voice could be heard from outside.

 

 

“Ueda, are you in there? Why is the door locked?” Nakamaru’s voice came next.

 

 

“Your sorry excuse of a band is back,” Ryo drawled bored.

 

 

Ueda shrugged. “You say that but we still sell more records than both your bands,” which earned him a very sharp jab in the side.

 

 

“Oww! That hurt, bastard!”

 

 

“You started it,” Ryo said, his pride very obviously stung. “And you still haven’t made it up to me for all that crap you put me through the past few weeks.”

 

 

“Well, you deserved it,” Ueda pouted to hide his embarrassment, crossing his arms, a tinge of pink on his cheeks.

 

 

And Ryo felt a sudden urge to grab him and to never let go. Ever since realizing his… attraction for the other boy, he’s been noticing these kinds of urges were occurring at a rather alarming frequency.

 

 

As he stared at the man he could now call his boyfriend, a genuine happy smile spread across his lips for the first time in ages. He distinctly wondered how their relationship could have changed so much in these past few weeks.

 

 

“Nishikido, Pi says if you don’t get your ass back at rehearsals, there will be hell to pay,” Kame’s voice came drifting through the door.

 

 

Ryo groaned. “Count on Pi to hunt me down. I need to go or I might get castrated, wouldn’t put it past Pi,” he shuddered involuntarily. “So, what about that dinner tonight?”

 

 

“Hmm, I don’t know. A locked toilet sounds good right about now,” Ueda said, eyeing Ryo’s fingers which have mysteriously disappeared under his shirt and were now sending pleasurable shivers up his spine.

 

 

“Mmmm,” Ryo purred when he felt Ueda copying his actions. “Or we could forget your retarded band and have our fun right now.”

 

 

“And risk Yamapi’s wrath? I don’t think so.”

 

 

Ryo grimaced. “I guess not.”

 

 

Ueda laughed. A pure, innocent laugh. It was then Ryo caught himself staring and he realized he had been unconsciously holding his breath. He didn’t know it then but it was the first of many laughs that he will witness from then on.

 

 

 

 

Perhaps the day that he will say those 3 magic words to Ueda won’t be too far away… He had a feeling, and in fact was pretty sure that the day will come.

 

 

And when that day comes, Ryo thought, he would tell it to Ueda in some locked toilet somewhere.